my grandfather

i think i have talked about my grandfather before in my blog but i think now is a good time to talk about him again. i love my grandfather so much. it is weird for me to call him grandfather because he is pappap to me so i am going to call him pappap. my pappap is like the father i never had. when i was little and when i didn't have my stepdad he was the man that i looked to for guidance and love. he treated me like hhis daughter. every friday he would pick me up from school and take me to get my favorite ice cream and then i would go to his house and watch scooby doo and then i would sometimes spend the night. then there were sundays when we always ate lunch at ryan's which i still enjoy going to. also he had a beach house down in florida and we would often take expeditions to his house and spend the weekend at the beach and working on his roofing business. when we were at the beach house sometimes at night i would get scared and if that ever happened i would just go and crawl into pappap's bed and i would feel totally secure. but now he just isn't pappap and it is killing me. now he is sick. very sick. he used to be this handsome muscley man and now he is skinny and he is deteriorating. he is no longer the strong pappap i used to know. he has spinal cancer and it is terminal. he can't hardly eat anything. he is very very skinny. all he eats are protein shakes and he is so pale and i can tell he is in pain. i can see him dying before my eyes and it kills me. but yet though he is in pain and dying and can't eat anything he can still say that God is good to him and it is amazing to me how he can be going through something like that and still praise God. i love my pappap soooo much and i don't want him to ever leave me but i know he has to but i want him with me forever. God is good. keep trusting in Him till next time.

the Lord is good

i had such an awesome week!!!!! it was a ton of fun and it was awesome!!! i actually got to lead a little boy to the Lord. if you could pray for him please. his name is Jesus (YAY-soos). i am not completely sure he understood his decision and how it would change his life forever and i just really wish i could be there to disciple him and help him grow. it was just really hard to see him walk away knowing i would probably never see him again on this earth. i can only pray i will see him in Heaven. we did three childrens fair and they all went really well. we got a very good response from the neighborhood. all the kids loved the games. it was great!!! actually most of the kids there are very polite. it was just an awesome week. i learned so much about myself this week. i learned that i am sooooooooo selfish!!!! oh my word!!!!!! it was amazing how selfish i am. my youth pastor really drove the passage philippians 2 into us. one thing he did was that he made us write 20 ways we could apply that passage to our life and that really taught me a good lesson about selfishness and pride. i learned a whole lot. well now onto the fun stuff....we went to coney island!!!!! that place is the bomb!!!!!!!!!!! the roller coaster the cyclone is one of the most awesome roller coasters ever!!!!!! it is also one of the oldest man it was totally worth the 6 bucks i paid to ride it. it was awesome!!!!! oh and i am a beast when it comes to china town. i was vicious!!!! i have many funny stories from china town. oh...and i got the coolest belt buckle ever from there!!!! you will have to see it sometime. hehe!!!! well i guess i will rap up this post and to top it off i will post some of my pics from the trip. so keep staying strong in the Lord. till next time.